Victoria Matthews-Patel, Trauma-Informed Coach for Neurodivergent Women
WHO AM I?
PROFESSIONALLY
I am a Trauma-Informed Coach for Neurodivergent Women.
My coaching is person-centred, therapeutic and compassionate.
- Coaching Training with CoActive Training Institute
- Trauma Training with Lou Lebentz at The Voyage Academy
- Circles Training with Sally Golightly
My first book, It's Not Just You, Making Sense of Life and Thriving After Growing Up in an Emotionally Dysfunctional Family was published in 2023.
Prior to training as a Coach I worked in education, in the mainstream and charity sectors, for 25 years. I started as an Early Years teacher but soon specialised in literacy and dyslexia (Postgraduate Diploma in Dyslexia and Literacy, 1999) after witnessing children struggling with the way they were being taught in the mainstream school setting. I worked for the Dyslexia Institute/ Dyslexia Action for a number of years as their CPD Training Manager.
My work across my 25 year career has involved teaching, supporting, training, managing, mentoring and coaching people of all ages, especially championing neurodivergent children and adults.
I am neurodivergent (Audhd) and I work from a neurodivergent-affirming and inclusive perspective.
I am proud to be a member of the Association for Coaching and I adhere to its quality and standards.
PERSONALLY
I am compassionate, warm, open-hearted and chatty.
I am a deep thinker and deeply sensitive.
I love time with my people and time on my own.
​
My passions are:
Spending time with the wonderful people in my life, being in nature with my dog, going to the theatre, concerts and cinema.
I love the vibrancy, anonymity and buzz of a big city (my favourites are Glasgow, London and New York) and the tranquility and beauty of nature (North Yorkshire, Northumberland, Scotland and Norway).
Writing, journalling, stationery and scrapbooking bring me joy.
My favourite ways to soothe my nervous system are walking, Qigong, Yoga Nidra and singing in a choir.
​​
MY SELF-DISCOVERY
I went on my own self-discovery journey after completely losing my sense of self and having a breakdown in 2018, after years of ill physical and mental health.
I have lived experience of relational and attachment trauma, family dysfunction, estrangement, codependency, emotional abuse, and surviving and thriving with Complex PTSD.
​
Discovering my own trauma inspired me to train in trauma.
I understand the impact the early years, the experience of attachment in childhood, and the impact trauma has on the way people show up in life and relationships.
The impact trauma has on the brain, nervous system, health, wellbeing and sense of self.
The pain of feeling unseen, unheard and unsupported by partners and family members.
The utter confusion and pain of emotional abuse within close relationships.
The daily trauma experienced by neurodivergent women.
​
The realisation that I am autistic and have ADHD (AuDHD) three years into my trauma healing (self-diagnosed at 51) added a whole new dimension to my self-discovery voyage.
It threw everything that I knew about myself up in the air at first, but exploring my neurodivergence has really brought me home to my true self, and has lead to self-acceptance and true self-worth and to knowing what I want, need and deserve in connection with, and in relationship with, others.
HOW CAN YOU WORK WITH ME?
Through person-centred, therapeutic and compassion-focused 1-2-1 coaching on Zoom.
Through compassion-focused Wellbeing Circles.
​
You can read about the first few years of my trauma healing, and how I went from surviving to thriving in my book, "It's Not Just You, Making Sense of Life and Thriving After Growing Up in an Emotionally Dysfunctional Family".
